Wow. This is absolutely me this year. Christmas has become so crazily commercial that I can't even enjoy it. So... this year, my husband and I are committed to giving a single gift to each of our grown kids, their wives, and our grandkids. That's it. Because it's all we can handle. Let somebody else do that super special and complicated multivariate social calculus. Count us out. Thanks for this post. And God bless you as you navigate the season. 🌻
I propose the perfect HWFO solution: only buy people firearms, firearm equipment, or ammo. It's like being a single issue voter but for Christmas gifts.
This is me every year. Except the anxiety about the gifts often bleeds over to everything else.
Oh, and my wife doesn't think it's fair that she has to do so much of the gift work, but offers to do it anyway to the point of buying herself stocking stuffers (gotta pack that stocking full of crap nobody asked for) and I just end up feeling bad about the whole thing.
There's an app or program called Elfster. Get your family to join. Each person is assigned one other person to buy a gift for. People post lists of ideas for gifts for themselves. It's improved our Christmases times infinity.
My relationship with Christmas utterly changed during my senior year of high school. I was working retail and a mindless frenzy, cornball music playing on a torture loop, and the disconnect from worthwhile meaning soured me for life. Decades later, with a large family, and no escape from the performances, "I often think the juice ain't worth the squeeze." I'm already so busy and life is already so full that making room for what we call Christmas isn't worth the energy and attention it demands.
Yes, this is the issue I have, too. I've decided to push for shared activities instead of gift exchanges with my family. Either that or just say I'm boycotting the holiday. No one can really stop me from boycotting if I want to.
You left out the proliferation of inflatable plastic yard decorations that during the day make yards look like recycling centers after a windstorm. Inflatable landfill.
If I want to give someone a gift, I give them a gift. For no damn reason other than I want to give them a gift. I so resent obligatory gifting for holidays and birthday days
The solution to the problem of gift-giving (and shopping) is books. I started giving everyone books for Christmas thirty years ago. It takes some thought... you do want to buy books that others will enjoy... but it simplifies the shopping and may even be pleasurable for those who enjoy browsing in book stores.
I don’t know dude. Seems to me you care waaay too much what people think about you and what you gift them. Personally I buy what I buy,giving zero consideration to weather or not it’s expensive enough or not. And if the recipient of the gift doesn’t like it cause it’s not worth enough for him/her. Well not someone that will remain in my small gift circle anyway. Bottom line,since I’m not a religious believer anyway,to me and my type of people I surround myself with,it’s about getting to enjoy each others company,enjoy fine meal together. Hope Christmas gets better for ya bro.
Yeah I like to do a good job at gifting, but really I just do the best I can and then don't worry too much about it. Most people really do seem to appreciate getting anything that's remotely fitting, and if they're high maintenance ingrates, that's their problem.
I used to have so much anxiety at Christmas because of the gift giving. I am a person who feels I have to give the “perfect” gift. And then I would be disappointed when I received gifts that I didn’t seem thoughtful.
So after many years I finally said this is too much, I’m starting to hate Christmas because of the obligatory gifts. So my husband and I decided to tell our family and friends no more gift exchanges. And I think they were all relieved too!
Except my husband and I will exchange gifts. We each buy exactly what we want and give it to the other to wrap, although we do buy a few “surprises “. It has worked out so great for us and like Christmas now.
We’ve been together almost 50 years so that’s a lot of Christmases!
I wouldn't call her "new." I would call her "from Beverly Hills." And I would note that Southern Grandparents via the late wife are at least 50% of this problem.
That multivariate social analysis shit seems way more complicated than anything I could ever figure out. My solution is to be *completely erratic* in my gift giving from year to year, and to also give people "Christmas presents" on all sorts of days that are nowhere near any recognized value of $CHRISTMAS. Nobody expects anything of me because nobody has any idea what to expect from me, and boy howdy do they get it good and hard. 🤣🤣🤣
Plus, it's really fun to baffle people by walking up to them in like, June, handing them a box, and yelling out "MERRY CHRISTMAS!"
As a child, on Christmas day, I'd watch two uncles shake hands and exchange $10 bills. Seemed like a pretty good system.
My (much) older brother used to give me cash for my birthday. Worked for me.
The evil version would be the bet from Trading Places. One dollar.
Wow. This is absolutely me this year. Christmas has become so crazily commercial that I can't even enjoy it. So... this year, my husband and I are committed to giving a single gift to each of our grown kids, their wives, and our grandkids. That's it. Because it's all we can handle. Let somebody else do that super special and complicated multivariate social calculus. Count us out. Thanks for this post. And God bless you as you navigate the season. 🌻
I tell my wife every Christmas that next year we're going Jew.
I propose the perfect HWFO solution: only buy people firearms, firearm equipment, or ammo. It's like being a single issue voter but for Christmas gifts.
Oh. My. God.
This is me every year. Except the anxiety about the gifts often bleeds over to everything else.
Oh, and my wife doesn't think it's fair that she has to do so much of the gift work, but offers to do it anyway to the point of buying herself stocking stuffers (gotta pack that stocking full of crap nobody asked for) and I just end up feeling bad about the whole thing.
There's an app or program called Elfster. Get your family to join. Each person is assigned one other person to buy a gift for. People post lists of ideas for gifts for themselves. It's improved our Christmases times infinity.
My relationship with Christmas utterly changed during my senior year of high school. I was working retail and a mindless frenzy, cornball music playing on a torture loop, and the disconnect from worthwhile meaning soured me for life. Decades later, with a large family, and no escape from the performances, "I often think the juice ain't worth the squeeze." I'm already so busy and life is already so full that making room for what we call Christmas isn't worth the energy and attention it demands.
Yes, this is the issue I have, too. I've decided to push for shared activities instead of gift exchanges with my family. Either that or just say I'm boycotting the holiday. No one can really stop me from boycotting if I want to.
Judaism's great, comes with many benefits, and has absolutely no drawbacks. You're already circumcised, right?
Wouldn't you like to know?
You left out the proliferation of inflatable plastic yard decorations that during the day make yards look like recycling centers after a windstorm. Inflatable landfill.
If I want to give someone a gift, I give them a gift. For no damn reason other than I want to give them a gift. I so resent obligatory gifting for holidays and birthday days
It’s a great time of year to be Jewish.
The solution to the problem of gift-giving (and shopping) is books. I started giving everyone books for Christmas thirty years ago. It takes some thought... you do want to buy books that others will enjoy... but it simplifies the shopping and may even be pleasurable for those who enjoy browsing in book stores.
I don’t know dude. Seems to me you care waaay too much what people think about you and what you gift them. Personally I buy what I buy,giving zero consideration to weather or not it’s expensive enough or not. And if the recipient of the gift doesn’t like it cause it’s not worth enough for him/her. Well not someone that will remain in my small gift circle anyway. Bottom line,since I’m not a religious believer anyway,to me and my type of people I surround myself with,it’s about getting to enjoy each others company,enjoy fine meal together. Hope Christmas gets better for ya bro.
Yeah I like to do a good job at gifting, but really I just do the best I can and then don't worry too much about it. Most people really do seem to appreciate getting anything that's remotely fitting, and if they're high maintenance ingrates, that's their problem.
I used to have so much anxiety at Christmas because of the gift giving. I am a person who feels I have to give the “perfect” gift. And then I would be disappointed when I received gifts that I didn’t seem thoughtful.
So after many years I finally said this is too much, I’m starting to hate Christmas because of the obligatory gifts. So my husband and I decided to tell our family and friends no more gift exchanges. And I think they were all relieved too!
Except my husband and I will exchange gifts. We each buy exactly what we want and give it to the other to wrap, although we do buy a few “surprises “. It has worked out so great for us and like Christmas now.
We’ve been together almost 50 years so that’s a lot of Christmases!
Pretty sure you are overthinking this.
Pretty sure he's got a brand-new girlfriend.
I wouldn't call her "new." I would call her "from Beverly Hills." And I would note that Southern Grandparents via the late wife are at least 50% of this problem.
That multivariate social analysis shit seems way more complicated than anything I could ever figure out. My solution is to be *completely erratic* in my gift giving from year to year, and to also give people "Christmas presents" on all sorts of days that are nowhere near any recognized value of $CHRISTMAS. Nobody expects anything of me because nobody has any idea what to expect from me, and boy howdy do they get it good and hard. 🤣🤣🤣
Plus, it's really fun to baffle people by walking up to them in like, June, handing them a box, and yelling out "MERRY CHRISTMAS!"